Marriage and Children

According to the Book of Common Prayer, “Marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman, binding both to self-giving love and exclusive fidelity. The rite of Holy Matrimony is a worship service of the Church, in which the couple exchanges vows to uphold this covenant” (page 198). The Prayer Book rite of Holy Matrimony places marriage in its biblical and theological context, and outlines the purposes for which marriage was ordained by God: “for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord; for mutual joy, and for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; to maintain purity, so that husbands and wives, with all the household of God, might serve as holy and undefiled members of the Body of Christ; and for the upbuilding of Christ’s kingdom in family, church, and society, to the praise of his holy Name” (pages 201-202). All those who seek to be married in the Anglican Church of North America are required to sign a “Declaration of Intention” affirming their acceptance of this understanding of Christian marriage, and their commitment to abide by it. The canons also require that both members of the couple have received Christian Baptism prior to being married. If either of them has previously been married and their former spouse is still alive, the bishop’s written permission must be obtained before any new marriage is allowed.

Because of the seriousness of Holy Matrimony, and because many people (even those with a Christian background) may not fully understand Christian teaching about marriage, thorough preparation is essential. The homily may provide an appropriate opportunity to help others who gather to understand the vision and meaning of Christian marriage, as well. In addition to preparing the bride and groom, and offering appropriate guidance for others involved in the service, the priest in charge is responsible to make sure that all elements of the liturgy itself, including the music, are appropriate for a service of Christian worship.

When God blesses a married couple with children, the Prayer Book offers a rite of “Thanksgiving for the Birth or Adoption of a Child,” which may be used in public worship, in the home, or at a hospital or place of birth, as appropriate. In historic Prayer Books, the related rite was called “The Churching of Women,” which gave thanks to God for bringing a mother safely through the dangers of childbirth. This, too, can be an appropriate pastoral use of this liturgy.

Candidates are expected to have read and be able to explain the provincial and diocesan canons related to Holy Matrimony, as well as the liturgy and related material in the Prayer Book and Catechism. They should also be prepared to provide instruction for a couple seeking to be married. Finally, though should consider the pastoral opportunities and complexities that may arise in using the rite of Thanksgiving for the Birth or Adoption of a Child.

Areas of Liturgics

1. History of Christian Worship
2. Content and use of The Book of Common Prayer
3. Daily Office
4. Corporate and Private Prayer
5. Sacramental Theology
6. The Holy Eucharist
7. Baptism and Confirmation
8. Marriage and Children
9. Rites of Healing
10. Death and Burial
11. Sanctification of Time
12. Sanctification of Space
13. Liturgy and Music
14. Liturgy and Mission